Chapter Thirty-Eight: A Room Fit for an Emperor and a Marketplace

Hiss rubbed his face. It seemed that even a metropolis like the Quartz League could not entirely rid itself of its darker side. This place simply had a rather unusual way of expressing it. What surprised Hiss even more was that it was no longer limited to little cards featuring humans—there were cards featuring Pokémon now, too.

“Mm... They’re all fake. It’s definitely the same old trick.”

Although he found it utterly ridiculous, Hiss hurried to explain. He had no desire to receive a smiling anti-fraud call from Officer Jenny later on.

Yes, the Pokémon world naturally had telephone scams as well. Just as there was always both light and darkness in the world, there were criminals who targeted people’s wallets. The Kanto League had even launched a campaign specifically to protect citizens from such scams.

The first time Hiss learned about it was quite some time ago. Back when he was making money from his food cart, he received a call claiming that there had been a minor problem with the starter Pokémon he had reserved, and that it could only be resolved by paying a certain amount of League Coins.

Hiss had then told the caller expressionlessly that he was so poor he could not even afford a Poké Ball. The other party continued coaxing him, suggesting that he borrow money from a nearby lending company. It was not until Sister Maple came to “visit” Hiss that the caller finally abandoned the idea under her extremely intimidating warning.

After tossing the still-rambunctious Zorua into the lounge, Hiss drove his food truck toward the Quartz League’s market. He remembered a scholar once saying that if one wanted to understand a city, one should visit its market. That was where one could best glimpse the city’s true character.

Hiss had to admit he was a little excited. The markets he had visited before had all been in Viridian City, and this was truly his first time visiting one in another place.

After parking the food truck near the market and locking the doors, Hiss entered with Zorua. Farfetch’d, Charmander, and Snow Snorlax had already been returned to their Poké Balls. Snow Snorlax in particular was simply too conspicuous to leave outside.

“Trainer, what are we going to do?” Zorua asked curiously from atop Hiss’s head.

“Buy groceries. Haven’t you noticed that we’ve had less and less to eat lately?”

Hiss wandered through the market with interest. The Quartz League’s market looked more or less like Viridian City’s, but the floors were much cleaner, and there were no street vendors. Every merchant sold their ingredients from behind a counter.

Although the place was cleaner and more hygienic, Hiss felt that it lacked a certain warmth and bustle. Still, he was not one to fuss over such things, and he focused on selecting the ingredients he needed.

The Quartz League headquarters certainly lived up to its reputation. After looking around, Hiss came to a simple conclusion: there was an enormous variety of ingredients here, and their quality was excellent. Even the most ordinary bok choy had no wilted or damaged leaves.

This pleased Hiss considerably. Yet after gazing at the dazzling array of ingredients, he hesitated before finally choosing what he planned to cook that day. Once he had bought a generous amount, he carried the bags back to the food truck. He still needed to visit a supermarket for seasonings and other supplies.

“Trainer, are we going to stay at a hotel? If we stay at one, will the bed move by itself?”

Perched on Hiss’s head, Zorua gently patted his cheek with a paw.

“You mean an electric bed? But I’m not staying in a hotel. We can just buy some bedding and solve the sleeping problem inside the food truck.”

Hiss waved a hand. He knew exactly what Zorua meant the moment he heard the description.

“Hey, what electric bed? I once saw the author mention a kind of bed that was incredibly amazing!”

Zorua curled its lip disdainfully. Hiss froze for a moment. Wasn’t a bed that moved on its own simply an electric bed? Usually, it was the sort of thing couples chose when checking into a hotel. Those who knew, knew.

“That was a legendary emperor-class suite! The moment you walked in, you’d see a bed made from hundreds of Ditto. You could choose any shape you wanted!”

Zorua excitedly explained this to Hiss, while Farfetch’d listened with curiosity nearby.

“And once the battle began, you could have Hypno help you last longer. You could even enjoy psychic stimulation and freely choose your favorite position in midair~ You could also have Jynx cool you down. And if you didn’t want to move, Rapidash would operate the machinery for you, letting you experience the joy of more than fifty motions per second~”

Zorua spoke with an expression of intoxicated delight. Hiss drew a deep breath and covered his face.

He absolutely did not want to hear any more. Where had Zorua picked up all this bizarre knowledge? Could authors these days please act normal? Was this really something that belonged in the Pokémon world? This was downright infernal.

“All right, stop. I don’t want to hear it. A room like that has to be fake. There’s no way in the world...”

Seeing that Zorua seemed ready to continue for another couple of sentences, Hiss quickly reached out and covered its mouth.

Yet as he spoke, Hiss gradually fell silent. If this had happened in the past, he would certainly have scoffed at the idea. But after seeing the Pokémon card Zorua had just brought over, his confidence had quietly vanished.

Perhaps such a room really did exist. After all, Pokémon were Pokémon, and humans were humans. The sort of things humans did with one another were, to Pokémon, no different from watching humans and nature. No one would feel excited at the sight of two wild animals mating, would they?

If someone truly did find that exciting, Hiss could only recommend that they visit a hospital and see a doctor to find out whether their preferences could still be saved.

Hiss quickly set the food truck’s destination. He intended to visit a large supermarket to buy what he needed. Food for Snow Snorlax was one concern, and the seasonings also needed replenishing. But what he wanted most urgently was furniture.

Sleeping bags were not unbearable, but there was an enormous difference between sleeping in one and sleeping in a proper bed. Hiss had only left Viridian City a few days ago, yet he was already beginning to deeply miss the warm little nest he had enjoyed in Officer Jenny’s dormitory.

“As they say, there’s no place like home.”

Hiss stretched. He felt that he had not been sleeping particularly comfortably lately. Once he bought a proper bed, that problem should be greatly alleviated.

Before long, Hiss spotted his destination: Greedent Shopping Supermarket.