Chapter Sixty-Five: Before the Break of Dawn (Bonus Chapter)

I just received notice from the editor: today, my novel can finally be published online. Thank you to the editor and everyone for your support. In celebration, I’m releasing the promised bonus chapter for fifty thousand clicks ahead of schedule on the public version. There will be another VIP chapter update this afternoon—I hope you’ll support my debut subscription. Each chapter costs only a few cents, but it means everything for the fate of this story. Thank you all, love you!

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Dong Yanyan leaned against a desk in the front row, her brow furrowed and her head propped in her hand, feeling a dull ache.

“Yanyan, don’t be upset. Come to our dorm and practice singing with me, okay? Also, I want your advice on what to wear for the next competition,” Liu Siying tugged at her arm, pulling her downstairs.

Once the two arrived at Liu Siying’s dorm, the other girls greeted them blandly before going back to their own conversations, ignoring them. Dong Yanyan understood: Liu Siying was far too favored by the teachers and always performed outstandingly, so it was inevitable she didn’t quite fit in. Watching Liu Siying pay no mind to the others’ indifference, her head bowed in concentration as she fiddled with her tape recorder amid the bustling chatter, Yanyan suddenly felt a pang of sympathy. She was only a seventeen-year-old girl, and even with her own mental age of thirty-something, there were times she couldn’t help being impulsive. Yet Liu Siying seemed to face everything with calm detachment, doing only what she believed right—proud and stubborn. In the past, Yanyan hadn’t liked classmates like her, thinking them pretentious and fake, but after months of getting to know her, she realized Liu Siying was actually endearing, just not skilled at interacting with peers. Few people ever tried to understand her without bias. After all, they were all teenage girls, each with a touch of princess syndrome. No one wanted to treat someone else as a princess or always stand in the shadow of another’s glow, making themselves seem dull and ordinary.

*

On Wednesday morning, Dong Yanyan received her first payment for a manuscript. With no classes that afternoon, she rushed to collect the money, delighted. She hadn’t expected that a social commentary of less than a thousand words would earn her two hundred yuan, though the price had been countless rejections. If she hadn’t been so exuberant after returning to this world, she might never have persisted until the article was finally published. Lost in thought, she found herself at the department store, remembering her cosmetics were nearly finished—perfect timing to use the money for something new. She entered the store in high spirits.

After buying cleanser and face cream and choosing a lipstick from the Maybelline counter, she headed to the cashier, where she happened to spot Li Zhe from the broadcasting class, arm-in-arm with their class belle, Zhang Xiaolin, wandering nearby.

Li Zhe saw her and immediately came over with enthusiasm. “Yanyan, you still buy these things yourself? Why not ask Jiaxuan to come with you?”

Dong Yanyan glanced at the shopping bags in his hands, then at the petite beauty clinging to his arm, merely smiling in response.

Well, from childhood, she’d never been in the habit of asking others for things.

Zhang Xiaolin wandered over to the counter with her and exclaimed in delight, “I love this brand of lipstick too! Yanyan, which color suits me?”

“The red is passionate, the purple seductive, the pink tender; you can try them all. Using just one color every day is so monotonous. Oh, and this brand’s mascara is excellent—you should give it a shot. All right, I won’t disturb you two any longer, I’ll be off now!” Dong Yanyan picked up her shopping bag, waved to them, and turned to leave.

Outside, the weather was gloomy, a light snow drifting down. She rubbed her hands together and boarded the bus back to school.

Covered in wind and snow, she rushed into the dorm, tossed her purchases onto the bed, and immediately ran to the radiator to warm her hands. A touch revealed it was colder than her hands. She searched for her hot water bottle; the water inside had cooled too.

“This is impossible! We have to change dorms—I’m going to find the teacher, this must be dealt with!” she shouted, unable to bear it.

“I already told the teacher. She said we need to endure for another half year. When the new students arrive, we can move upstairs,” Liu Ying poked her head out from under the covers, laughing.

“So this is the darkest hour before dawn? Ugh, I can’t take it anymore!” Dong Yanyan shivered, still chilled to the bone from outside, unable to warm up in the room’s meager heat.

“I wonder if the classroom’s radiator is warm. Anyone want to come with me to warm up?” As she spoke, she scanned the room. Xinran and Xiaohan were sound asleep under the covers; Li Hui sat on her bed, reading without raising her head. The others, hearing her, hurriedly shook their heads and burrowed deeper into their blankets.

“I’ve just warmed up my spot, I’m not going,” Yu Xia laughed.

“Fine, I’ll go myself.” Dong Yanyan grabbed a book and rushed upstairs.

The classroom was deserted, most students probably off seeking warmth somewhere else. She went to the radiator, and thankfully, it was hot. She pressed her hands to it, still a bit cold, wishing she could press her whole body against it. She grabbed a chair, sat beside it, and rested her feet on the radiator. The snow on her shoe soles melted, dripping onto the floor. She shrugged, pressing her body as close as possible.

Her frozen red hands tingled against the scalding radiator. She placed her warm hands on her icy cheeks, enjoying a fleeting moment of comfort. She suddenly thought it was pure madness to go out on such an icy day. It hadn’t been this cold in the morning, but by noon, the biting northern wind was enough to freeze anyone.

“After years of hard work, suddenly back to square one—what a tragedy! If only I had a place of my own. At least I wouldn’t have to suffer like this.” She lay against the radiator, reminiscing about her sunlit living room back home in winter, where the computer desk sat by the radiator and the noon sun was so bright she had to draw the curtains. At this hour, she’d usually be browsing the web, admiring handsome men on Tianya, or typing while listening to music. If she grew tired, she could nap. When she went out, it was always straight to the car, then into the mall, or she’d just shop online if she didn’t want to go out. Thinking back, it was such a comfortable life.

Whether that was evolution or regression, she wasn’t sure.

She had tasted hardship, and truthfully, once you’ve suffered, you never want to again.

Lost in her wandering thoughts, the classroom door opened. Lin Feng rushed to his seat, and seeing Dong Yanyan sitting there, he paused.

Dong Yanyan looked up at him, glanced at her chair, then smiled and said, “Sorry, I took your seat. I saw no one was here, so I came over to warm up by the radiator.”

“It’s fine, stay as long as you like.” Lin Feng smiled, grabbed a chair, and sat beside her. “Did you just go out?” he asked.

Dong Yanyan nodded. “I went out at noon to run some errands, and ended up like this—frozen.” She looked at her hands, not only red but cracked and dry. Embarrassed, she pulled them back, stuffing them into her pockets. Winter was too cold and dry, the wind too harsh; no matter how carefully she took care of them, her hands would never be as soft and fair as other girls’.

“You always seem so full of energy, like nothing can stop you. But I worry you’ll wear yourself out,” Lin Feng said softly, watching her hands.